strong words..

time off?

feels a little strange with so much time to myself. tried to sleep off my flu/sore throat thing. not sure if i feel any better. maybe i should be taking some time off. but it would kinda suck to spend that time sleeping.
very quickly it has already been three months back on the job. i guess three months is a good trade off for three shiny awards. a bit off a slow start, got to refresh myself on procedures. people tell me, don't waste time. not quite sure what the rush is really. picture's a little clearer. and then again it's not. if anything is certain, it's uncertainty.


now if we had all the answers, where would the fun be in that?

i think i'm done?

we got our advance pay. everyone's going out to party. the guys jio-ed me to join them. strangely thankfully, not interested. i guess this is good. hahhah. 


been trying to work on my thought life this week... esp since last week's lesson. somehow when you resolve to do something, at the time, i seems relatively easy to achieve. however, once the week starts, in the thick of it, somehow, it becomes particularly testing.


i guess it's good to keep growing.
your limits grow too.


but don't push it punks

you call

i heard you. i hear you still.. i know the paths are many, many look better than the one you're pointing out. at least they look that way to me. in my perverse rebellion, other options suddenly seem better than your choice.. it– the road, looks dangerous, slippery, dark and seems to be headed in the wrong direction.


but i hear your call. i know there's only one choice. 
i fix my eyes upon the prize, my head will not turn from it, neither to the left nor the right.


let's go!

His heart

slippery slopes

"we have grown in numbers, wealth, and power.. We have vainly imagined, in the deceitfulness of our hearts, that all these blessings were produced by some superior wisdom and virtue of our own. We have become too self-sufficient... too proud to pray to the God that made us!"


- sounds familiar? too familiar in fact. 
a bit of a conundrum really..

ah hah!

ok lightbulb moment... well, to be more exact, closer to vindication i would say. i knew there was something amiss.. just couldn't quite put my finger on it. you know the feeling right? it's like so close, it's just beyond your nose, but it's dark, so you can't see it. and then the lights (hence lightbulb moment) come on and...


ah hah!