reflections..

are laterally inverted FYI. ok still as lame as ever. just putting down some things that i've been mulling over of late..

how is it that it is sooo difficult to process your application to an organisation that supposedly needs people? of which, former employees often discourage me from signing up.. despite them knowing that it is my dream job..

how long does it take to recover from laryngitis? seriously man.. this is taking forever and i'm fearing the damage is permanent.. the novelty of being 'rocker' sounding is beginning to wear off.

what's new about news when you've already suspected it to be true all along? are we just looking for some sort of vindication? or affirmation?

why the hell does my shoulder still ache? can i pop it out and then put it back properly?

Happy New Year.

serious okaay..

yeah. it's getting serious. i'm beginning to grasp the full extent of what it means to fight to maintain your freedom. plus, taking every thought captive, is no mean feat when you've got a fantastic imagination like mine. but nevertheless, through the trials and changes, One thing remains.. of which sometimes, i neglect to be thankful for.

Sometimes you only want to 'hear' the things you want to hear... and only 'see' the things you wanna see. but ultimately, there's only one Boss with a plan.. The Plan. perhaps i've been listening to 'the misinformation' for too long... accepting it in my ignorance. alas, the fiery darts have somehow upgraded into incendiary bombs. i guess i should console myself that i've levelled up? funny how easily i am discouraged by the present and forget about your faithfulness.. in some sort of weird sense, i think the only way forward is looking back. makes sense?

oh well, go figure.

keeping still.

and staying focused is so hard to do when you mind's entertaining doubts. or when your heart's racing. i know, i know, i spoke too soon. Just as i said i wasn't worried, the fiery arrows of doubt whistled in and ignited. classic man. i even began to doubt whether i even sent in my application. champion right? i just wanted to confirm everything.. like now. like geez, stop being such a tease man. i could always call up people, who would know someone on the inside... but the Word came through.. and i think (i say think because i don't wanna do it) it is to wait. suddenly that stupid hymn in the school hymn book makes sense now.

trust and obey.